C.: And the Rockets' red glare
!
Hi! Man, I am in a good mood today! I put all of my debt to Tom the Tabby on the Rockets' game last night, and they won! They beat the Atlanta Hawks! Now, I can relax. I mean, if the Rockets had lost, I might have had to get a job. Can you see me working, like as a barn cat or something like that? It would have been HORRIBLE! The pay is good. All the dead rats one can consume, but I just do NOT think that I am cut out to be an outside cat. I'm relieved that I won that bet.
d.: Cal.E., how much did you bet on that game?
C.: My whole debt that I owed Tom the Tabby for all the catnip I bet on football games last week. I only won one game. That was the Cowboys' game.
d.: How much catnip did you owe your bookie?
C.: Two pounds.
d.: What on Earth were you going to do with THAT much catnip? Sell it?
C.: No, d.c. I was going to eat it all.
d.: Two pounds? That would last the average cat a couple of months if s/he ate as much as that cat could consume in one day! Besides, you are a recovering catnip addict. You are NOT supposed to be consuming ANY catnip. Isn't Trazodone working for you?
C.: Trazodone is NOT catnip. It works okay to calm me, but I haven't had any catnip for two months! I feel I must catch up! Now, though,Tom the Tabby will get my whole stash (heavy sigh).
d.: Be careful, you may get put back in rehab if your mom and dad catch you with two pounds of catnip. That is a lot of catnip for anyone. What do you think Tom will do with all that catnip?
C.: IDK, d.c. IF he needs to get rid of it quickly, though, he should know where to come! I will be glad to help him with that! I can quit catnip anytime I want, though, if I did start eating it again.
Now, I just need to place my bets for this weekend, so I can get some catnip. Do you have a newspaper, so I can see what the betting lines are on the NFL games?
d.: I think you are as addicted to gambling as you were to catnip. Maybe you should not bet anything this weekend, Cal.E. You are lucky that you came out even THIS time. What if you get into debt to Tom the Tabby again? What will he do to you if you do not pay him back in a timely manner?
C.: It would NOT be good. I would just save up all my catnip and pay him back. I have a contingency plan if I lose my bets to the Tabby, if it comes to that.Tom would never suspect me dressed as a dog. I can avoid him that way.
d.: For the rest of your life?
C.: If I must. It will be a dog's life, though. (hehe)
d.: Just be careful, Cal.E. You can get into real trouble with all your addictions. I don't want to see you put into the kennel for the rest of your life.
C.: I will be careful d.c. Now, do you have that newspaper, or must I steal one from my neighbor?
d.: I must leave and get ready for three o'clock medication administration. Be ready to take your Trazodone.
C.: Trazodone. Yea! I just want some catnip. I am Jonesing bad for it. I will bet twice as much as last week. That way, I will have four pounds of catnip. That should last me a couple of weeks. I hope that my neighbor hasn't taken his newspaper inside!
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