Cal.E.'s Korner

C.: Well, as soon as the tortoise Ten-kilometer race completes all its heats and declares a winner, the 2025 Animal Olympics will be over. Then my third husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As the Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken can get on with our lives.

T wants to train for a seventh cat fighting belt, but he and his tag-team partner, The Original Triple T; Tom the Tabby, are not speaking to each other. I doubt T can lose enough weight to cat fight as a feather weight. He weighed over fifty pounds a couple of years ago. Now, he’s down to a svelte 19.9987456123 pounds, but can make the middle weight limit of fifteen pounds if he diets diligently. I doubt, though, that he can get below twenty pounds and still maintain his strength. T does need to come home, though, because he needs to train to fight Tom again for the middleweight title, but T is tied up at the Animal Olympics.

T is serving as a “Good Will Ambassador” for the games, and he’s good at it. The officials want him to hang around until the tortoise ten k is over, so I’m getting on with my life, since that may take until Christmas. My thirty-third cousin twice removed, the Electrifying, Lively, Awesome Cat fighter ELAC,

my mirror opposite, and the intergalactic cat fighting of three different galaxies are having a tea. We’re discussing world events, like what happened in Central Texas. The death toll keeps rising, but the figures I see are conflicting. Some news sources put the death toll at over one hundred, and others have it in the eighties. I suppose that proves that the information we get from the news is dependent on whom we choose to listen to.