Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Make me, oh, make me, Lord, more than I am
Make a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly temptation below
I've got the will, Lord, if you've got the toe
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Bring on the brothers who've gone on before
And all of the sisters who've knocked at your door
All the departed, dear loved ones of mine
And stick 'em up front in the offensive line
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the rightStraight through the heart of them righteous uprightsDropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Yeah, dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Paul Charles Craft
Dropkick Me Jesus lyrics © Screen Gems-emi Music Inc., Black Sheep Music
d.: Well, Cal.E. is still filling in for Ralph. He called in sick to The Kennel with laryngitis. At least, that’s what The Kennel bosses think he said. He seems to have lost his voice while singing and yelling himself hoarse at the Astro’s last two games. Why a cage cleaner would need to be heard is a mystery, but he didn’t come to work the last two days, so Cal.E is filling in for him. That gives me a chance to address some other issues in sports outside of Houston.
Firstly, I want to address the Michigan electronic sign-stealing scandal. Anyone who thinks that Connor Stalions acted on his own accord is delusional, just as anyone who thinks this is an isolated incident is also delusional. Michigan dropkicked Stallions through the golaposts of life, but, much like the Astros’ electronic sign-stealing scandal, this is symbolic, a way to warn other schools. Just as I don’t believe anything would have been made of the Astros’ misdeeds if they hadn’t won their first World Series in 2017, I don’t think that this would have been a big deal at a smaller school. The University of Michigan is set to be the first college ever to win 1,000 college football games, and their coach, Jim Habough, is one of the biggest names in the sport. The slap on the wrist the NCAA administered to him (a three game suspension), is just a warning.
Seriously, though, do you believe that Kirby Smart and Nick Saban aren’t doing the same thing he and his staff did? In this era when everyone has a cell phone with at least one camera on it that’s better than any high-priced camera that could have been bought in the last century, I’m sure there are spies at every game that takes place, and that may even include Little League games.
I remember one practice we had when I was in high school when our coach stopped practice and decided to install a brand new offense, on a Wednesday. That was our hardest day of practice, and we tried to perfect the eight or ten plays we would run in that game. My coach was old school, lining up with two tight ends, a full house backfield and the strontgest lineman he could find at a small, AAA school. This practice, he split one end and sent one halfback to the other side of the field, as far out as he could go and still be on the practice field. After about thirty minutes of this, he blew his whistle, looked at our strong-aremd quarterback, and asked him what he thought. Ronnie was so dumbfounded that he couldn’t speak. It appeared as if he would finally get a chance to display the cannon he called a right arm. As a young man hurriedly left the field, my coach looked at his offense and said,” Forget that crap we just did, that was just for fun. Bring your pads tomorrow, though.” That surprised all of us, because we didn’t usually practice in pads the day before a game. My coach had been alerted to a spy, and he changed the offense to fool him. Spying on one of our practices would be the only way to know what offense or defense our team ran in a game, because it changed every weeek. My coach was one of the most successful high school coaches in the state of Missisppi, and he knew what to look for. But, if illegal spying occurs on this level, how much more does it occur when big money is concerned?
I’m not just talking about gambling. Texas A&M paid Jimbo Fisher a king’s ransom to leave, and my alma mater decided to part ways with their former defensive coordinator-turned head coach after the same game. I think both moves were mistakes.
Fisher probably would have been fired, anyway eventually, because his team underperformed consistently, but A&M could have saved some money by keeping him employed a little longer. Zack Arnett, though, I believe will get another opportunity and prove his old bosses wrong. He was dealt a tough hand when his quarterback, whom his late boss, Mike Leach built his whole offense around, suffered an injury that caused him to miss several games. Then, his star running back was forced out by injury, and Mississippi State doesn’t have the depth that Alabama or LSU has. Even though Texas A&M destroyed my team (and then fired their coach), I still believe he will be a good coach. Bill Billichik was fired from his first two jobs, and now is regarded by some (but not me) as the greatest NFL coach of all time. Arnett will land on his feet, and Jimbo Fisher can buy as many feet or whatever else he needs with the 77 million dollars he was paid to go away. Life isn’t always fair, but it’s usually interesting if one is paying attention.
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