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Writer's picturemarkmiller323

Cal.E.'s Korner














We're caught in a trap

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Why can't you see

What you're doing to me

When you don't believe a word I say?

We can't go on together

With suspicious minds (suspicious minds)

And we can't build our dreams

On suspicious minds

So if an old friend I know

Stops by to say hello

Would I still see suspicion in your eyes?

Here we go again

Asking where I've been

You can't see the tears are real, I'm crying

(Yes I'm crying)

We can't go on together

With suspicious minds (suspicious minds)

And we can't build our dreams

On suspicious minds

Oh, let our love survive

I'll dry the tears from your eyes

Let's don't let a good thing die

When honey, you know I've never lied to you

Mmm, yeah, yeah

We're caught in a trap

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Why can't you see

What you're doing to me

When you don't believe a word I say?

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

I can't walk out

Because I love you too much, baby

Well, don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Francis Zambon

Suspicious Minds lyrics © Sony/atv Songs Llc


d.: Man, this math homework is taking me some time to do, but I’m on my last problem. I just can't figure it out without more information. I hadn’t planned on stayiung up all night doing this, but what was it Mike Tyson said about plans?

Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.--Mike Tyson


d.: (I’d like to punch this paper right now). Without Cal.E.’s help, this math homework is taking me forever. I should call the “Homework Hotline,” I guess, to get their help. (ring)

Homework Hotline, formerly known as “The Soution,” and “The Best Solution” before that. We are currently experiencing a large volume of calls, so please hold for the next available math genius. You are currently number fifty-four in line. Please do not hang up and call back, as this will irritate us so much that we will refuse to answer your questions.

d.: ( I never realized so many people needed help with their homework at five in the morning. I suppose I should hold, though. I want my question answered.)

While you are waiting, could I possibly interest you in a permanent membership?

d.: How much does that cost?

Monetarily, nothing. However, I will need your name, your mother’s maiden name, your father’s middle name, as well as your social security number and the numbers of the three credit cards you use most frequently, along with the security numbers on these cards and their expiration dates.

d.: (This has “scam” written all over it.) “I think that I’ll pass on that permanent membership.”

Fine, sir, then we’ll just enlist you as a guest for the day.

d.: What information do you need for that?

None, and you can call us anytime you may need assistance.

d.: “Thanks, I’ll just hold and wait for the next available genius.”

You’re next in line, sir, madam, or nonbinary indifividual. A line has just opened up. Please hold.

d.: ( I thought that was what I was doing.)

Hello, and welcome to the “Homework Hotline,” formerly known as “The Soution,” and “The Best Solution” before that. How may I be of assistance to you today, sir, madam or nonbinary individual?

d.: I just need to know the value of Pi to the fifteenth digit. My calculator will only go to ten digits.

I can certainly help you with that, sir, madam, or nonbinary individual. First, however, I’ll need your name, age, street address, social security number, names of your three best childhood friends, your paternal grandmother’s maiden name, as well as your three most recent former addresses.

Additionally, I’ll need the name of the courses you are now taking, along with the instructor’s name and the name of the textbook being used. The page number and the number of the question being answered would also be helpful.

To further evaluate this problem, I’ll need the names of all the instutions of higher learning you’ve attended, the names of the courses you’ve taken at each one, the names of your instructors at these institutions and the learning material used in each course. Please indicate the highest level of education you obtained at each of these institutions, as well as your class ranking when and if you graduated from each and every institution you list.



C.: Hello? d.c., are you here?


d.: (Oh, good, Cal.E. and ELAC are back. They can both help me with this problem, and I won’t need this homework hotline.) (click). “I’m in here, Cal.E. Where have y’all been?”



ELAC: 2030.






d.: What?!

C.: ER…, my cousin doesn’t understand that we were just watching the new “Back to the Future” movie. Reality is a foreign concept to her. She thinks everything she sees on this planet is real.

d.: Oh, well, I didn’t know any movies were coming out, with the strike still going on. Was the movie good? And who played the lead?

C.: Well, it was all done by AI, so no actors were involved, nor writers.

d.: Yes, AI is taking over everything, but I suppose the movie was predictable, since AI doesn’t have the imagination that humans have. But, was the AI at least realistic?

E: Well….

C.: That’s all the time we have for today, folks, please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.


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