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Cal.E's Korner









Paperback writer (paperback writer) Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book? It took me years to write, will you take a look? It's based on a novel by a man named Lear And I need a job So I wanna be a paperback writer Paperback writer It's a dirty story of a dirty man And his clinging wife doesn't understand His son is working for the Daily Mail It's a steady job But he wants to be a paperback writer Paperback writer Paperback writer (paperback writer) It's a thousand pages, give or take a few I'll be writing more in a week or two I could make it longer if you like the style I can change it 'round And I wanna be a paperback writer Paperback writer If you really like it you can have the rights It could make a million for you overnight If you must return it you can send it here But I need a break And I wanna be a paperback writer Paperback writer Paperback writer (paperback writer) Paperback writer (paperback writer) Paperback writer (paperback writer) Paperback writer (paperback writer) Paperback writer (paperback writer)

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: John Lennon / Paul McCartney Paperback Writer lyrics © Iricom US Ltd, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC



C.: Hey, d.c., I’m bored. We’re both off work today. Why don’t we go do something fun?



d.: I can’t Cal.E…






C.: Why not?



d.: I’m involved in about three different projects right now.


C.: Oh, I see. Eudora is cracking the old whip, huh?


d.: No, not really. These are all projects of my own choosing.


C.: What are you working on?


d.: Well, I signed up for a writing class, but I’ve completed that assignment. After I finished that, I decided to look for agents who handle nonfiction writers, since I’ve sent out about thirty or forty feelers for my fiction book. Some say that I can email them if they haven’t answered in a specific amount of time, and a few are in that category. However, I looked on my website and saw that one agent wanted a longer synopsis and query letter than most other agents for my nonficition manuscript.


C.: Why is that?


d.: I don’t know a lot about the publishing business. I’ve been away from writing columns for newspapers and magazines for over twenty years, and a lot of things have changed. For instance, most agents want a query letter that is around 250 words long and a synopsis of the manuscript that is 500-600 words long. The synopsis is easy, but explaining a whole manuscript in 250 words or less is hard.


C.: It does sound hard. Why don’t the agents want the writer to use more words to describe his or her manuscript?


d.: For two reasons. One is that most agents get about 600 query letters a week, so they don’t have a lot of time to read a lot of long emails. Another is that the agents want to see if an author can get his or her point across using an economy of words…


C.: What does that mean?


d.: Using as few words as possible to make a certain point or to tell part of a story…


C.: Why didn’t you just say that?


d.: I did. I used an economy of words to describe what the agents want.


C.: Well, if you’re through with the query letter or the synopsis, may I read on or both? I'm bored and I need something to do.


d.: No, not yet I’m not through with either, and I only have a rough draft at best. It will take me a few days to get the whole book on paper using an economy of words…


C.: Okay, what’s the other thing you’re trying to do?


d.: I’ve decided to go back to school…


C.: At your age? And don’t you already have like one thousand hours of obedience school classes? Haven’t you learned to be obedient between all those hours of study and being married for like one hundred years?


d.: I’m trying to get a bachelor’s degree in nursing. I think our unit may close in the next two years, so I want to be able to get another job that’s close to where we live.


C.: Can’t you just retire when our kennel closes? Aren’t you old enough to do that?


d.: Not really, because too many people are living long lives after they retire. The age for retirement is getting higher, as is the cost of living. What I make at The Kennel now would probably compare to what I made when I first got out of college, according to the price index the government uses. That means that I will still need to work for seven or eight more years.


C.: Can we go do someothnig fon when you're through with all three projects?


d.: As I said before, it will take a few days to come up with something I’m satisfied with…


C.: Just long enough for me to take a nap!


d.: I guess that’s all the time we have for today, then. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.

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