Cal.E.'s Korner

C.: Well, I’m monitoring our 119 line, so I’ll just take a nap. There aren’t any people who are going to call in and brag about how well their lives are going. This is a day off for me….(ring).

“Hello?”

d.: Hi, I just called to brag about how well the Houston sports teams are going to do this year, especially the Astros! I’m their number one, or number two, maybe fourth or fifth, or one-hundred and fifth. No, wait. There are how many people in greater Houston? About eight million, so, divide by the square root of pi… multiply by two and subtract 17.9987...I’ll just say that I’m the Astros four-hundred and first biggest fan.

C.: d.c., is that you?

d.: Yes, Cal.E., it’s me, and I’m pumped about the trades the Astros made in the last two days. They got the players they needed without giving up much…

C.: Except they didn’t get a starting pitcher, and the Astros will owe Carlos Correa about one billion dollars over the course of his contract.

d.: Yes, but we’ll win the World Series every year that he’s here. Not only that, but the Texans will win the Super Bowl, and the Rockets will win another NBA championship.

C.: All because the Astros brought Carlos Correa back to Houston to play a position that he’s only played briefly during the World Cup (now the World Classic)?

d.: Well, the Astros will win the World Series with Correa and Jeremy Pena manning the left side of the infield. They may move a player or two to make this happen…

C.: The most significant of which will be their franchise cornerstone player, Jose Altuve, who slipped as a defensive second baseman and is a below-average left fielder.

d.: Yes, but playing in Daiken Park, that doesn’t matter. It’s a short throw from the Crawford Boxes to the shortstop. All Altuve needs to do is hit the cutoff man. Former World Series MVP Jeremy Pena is as good as it gets at shortstop right now, when he’s healthy.

C.: I would agree with that, and Carlos Correa was the heart and soul of the team when he was here. Alex Bregman and Jose Altuve were/are more “lead by example,” but Correa was the emotional leader of the team. He wasn’t afraid to call anyone out, even an icon like Altuve. So, yes, the Astros may win the World Series if they get one-half of the players they have on the injured list back before the playoffs. But how does that help the Texans win the Super Bowl and the Rockets win the NBA championship?

D.: It doesn’t, but the Texans have the best defense in the NFL, because their head coach has been calling defensive plays since he was playing pee-wee football. as a middle linebacker. He was great at doing that for the Texans when he played that position in Houston. Everyone knows that, in American football, offense sells tickets, but defense wins games, as well as championships. I just hope the San Francisco doesn’t lure him back there until he can win the Super Bowl in Houston.

C.: And the Rockets?

d.: The Rockets are a young team, but they have the right coach, and now, a true leader. Kevin Durant is a competitor who plays defense almost as well as the two players the Rockets had to give up to get him. His wingspan is seven feet, five inches, and he’s seven feet tall with his shoes on. He can handle the ball like a guard and play defense like Dillon Brooks did when he was here. He, in my opinion, is the “missing piece” to the Rocket’s puzzle.

C.: Okay, that makes sense. However, we left our audience hanging on one question yesterday.

d.: Which was?

C.: What does the T stand for in T. Puppy Katt’s name?

d.: Oh, yes, the T in T Puppy Katt’s name stands for (ring).

 C.:  Can I put you on hold, d.c.? I have another call.

d.: No, I must go back to work now.

C.: So, that’s all the time we have for today, folks, so that’s the end of today’s cat ta(i)le. Please join us tomorrow for another edition of Cal.E.’s Korner.