He went to Paris Looking for answers To questions that bothered him so
He was impressive, Young and aggressive, Saving the world on his own Warm summer breezes And french wines and cheeses Put his ambitions at bay
Summers and winters Scattered like splinters And four or five years slipped away
He went to England Played the piano And married an actress named Kim They had a fine life She was a good wife And bore him a young son named Jim
And all of the answers To all of the questions Locked in his attic one day He liked the quiet Clean country living And twenty more years slipped away
Well, the war took his baby Bombs killed his lady And left him with only one eye His body was battered His whole world was shattered And all he could do was just cry
While the tears were a' fallin' He was recallin' The answers he never found So he hopped on a freighter Skidded the ocean And left England without a sound
Now he lives in the islands Fishes the pylons And drinks his green label each day He's writing his memoirs And losing his hearing But he don't care what most people say
"Through eighty six years Of perpetual motion, " If he likes you, he'll smile and he'll say, "Some of it's magic, And some of it's tragic, But I had a good life all the way"
He went to Paris Looking for answers To questions that bothered him so
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Jimmy Buffett
He Went to Paris lyrics © American Broadcasting Music, Inc.
d.: Great! Dr. Buddy Bones came to earth from HTRAE to commandeer our most precious natural resources and bring them back to his native planet because HTRAE was running out of all types of fuel to power things on his home planet. Before he could accomplish this goal, though, he was caught by the dog catcher. After spending some time in the kennel when he was mistaken for a stray dog, he was adopted by my best friend and next door neighbor’s family. Much like the man in the Jimmy Buffet song at the beginning of this blog, he got so comfortable that he forgot why he came here. And, like the man in the song, he went back to his home broken-hearted when he got a message from his planet that his identical twin brother had died. He then went home to grieve and regroup.
When the evil genius recovered his wits, he kidnapped the leading mathematician on his planet’s kittens so that she would be obligated to come up with a formula to get him back to earth using as little fuel as possible. HTRAE wants to preserve as much fuel as they can. She tried to destroy the calculations by sending them into outer space in an experimental spacecraft that was piloted by a mouse, but he crash landed here. She was trying to destroy the wrong calculations. She made up some similar ones that would send Buddy Bones into outer space after narrowly missing the earth. She didn’t want to be irresponsible and start a fire by burning them up, and Buddy Bones is a whiz at putting puzzles together. ELAC was afraid he could piece the calculations back together if she shredded them. ZHe’s a whiz at putting puzzles together. Now, ELAC is afraid that an unscrupulous being will send the calculations back to the evil Dr. Buddy Bones if he offers enough incentive. Then he’ll come back and destroy the earth after he takes all our resources. I had the calculations last, but I can’t find them now. And, to top it all off, I have a flat on my bike!
Oh, well, the flat is the one thing I can fix.
Just a few yards away, in the house next door, Cal.E. is getting ready to go to her job at The Kennel.
C.: Well, I can’t help d.c. look for the calculations he lost, because I need to take a catnap before I go to my job at The Kennel tonight. I would call in sick, but I’m out of annual leave after the Cat Rodeo and the time I scheduled off for the Cat Skills Games. I’ll just close my eyes and try not to think about what might happen if those calculations fall into the wrong hands.
(Ca-a-a-al.E., you need to go help your friend find those calculations. Wake up!!)
C.: Meow Z. Tongue, what are you doing in my dreams?!
Meow: I’m calling you from The Planet of the Talking Cats, your home planet. I need those calculations because your planet is running out of fuel, too. I don’t have enough fuel to fly to earth and talk to you face-to-face. I need those calculations so that I can come to earth and take enough fuel home to keep mine and your home planet powered until my ultimate death, eight lives from now.
C.: And then what will happen?
M.: Why do I care? I’ll be dead!
C.: And so will I and everyone else on two planets if I do what you’re asking me to do!
M.: I’m the supreme ruler of the Cat Galaxy. You must do as I say!
C.: Or what? I’m here, and you can’t get to me. And I don’t have any relatives or friends I care about on POTT-C. You don’t have any control over me!
M.: Do you remember this?
C.: My kittenhood home and the kind couple that took me in when they found me on the street? The couple that introduced me to the king of the planet that resulted in me becoming the queen of my planet?
M.: Yes, them. They’re still alive and well as long as you cooperate. If not, it’s curtains for them and everyone and everything you care about on this planet.
C.: I suppose you're right. I’ll go help d.c. look for those calculations in a few minutes. I just need to freshen up a bit.
(I guess Meow Z. Tongue has me at a disadvantage. I must do as he says, or the kind couple who adopted me as a kitten will meet with their ultimate demise, unless….)
d.: Well, that’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.
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