Welcome to the Grand illusion
Come on in and see what's happening
Pay the price, get your tickets for the show
The stage is set, the band starts playing
Suddenly your heart is pounding
Wishing secretly you were a star
But don't be fooled by the radio
The TV or the magazines
They show you photographs of how your life should be
But they're just someone else's fantasy
So if you think your life is complete confusion
Because you never win the game
Just remember that it's a grand illusion
And deep inside we're all the same
We're all the same
So if you think your life is complete confusion
Because your neighbors got it made
Just remember that it's a grand illusion
And deep inside we're all the same
America spells competition, join us in our blind ambition
Get yourself a brand new motor car
Someday soon we'll stop to ponder what on earth's this spell we're under
We made the grade and still we wonder who the hell we are
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Dennis De Young
The Grand Illusion lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
C.: Hey, d.c., I just wanted to let you know something
d..: What’s that, Cal.E.?
C.: I’m a better writer than you are–
d.: Why do you say that?
C.: Because, I wrote my story and sold it on my first try, snd quickly, too. I just wrote it yesterday. I sent out one hundred emails immediately after I wrote it to find a publisher, and I’ve already gotten answers from all one hundred publishers I sent it to.
d.: That’s impressive. How many rejections did you get?
C.; Ninety-nine, but it only takes one publisher to publish a book!
d.: What publisher accepted your story?
C.: “Kitty Kitty Bang Bang.” All I must do is send them $500.00, and they will pay me whatever royalties my story yields. I will then be able to pay Tom the Tabby back, and be done with him!
On an unrelated note, Mom and Dad’s anniversary is coming up within the next year, and I want to buy them something special. Can I borrow five hundred dollars?
d.: First of all, your mom and dad just celebrated their silver anniversary. They’ve been married for twenty-five years this last Saturday. It will be almost another year before they celebrate another wedding anniversary.
Secondly, one of the people in my Facebook author’s group sent a hand-printed manuscript in crayon to the same publisher you did, printed in crayon. That publisher promised a best seller to that author, and asked for $500.00 to print the book. They said that the sales from the book would yield ten times that, once their editors corrected it, and they designed the cover. I think it is a form letter. I would imagine they made similar promises to you. Besides all that, that publisher publishes kitty porn!
C.: Well, maybe. But my story will be a bestseller, and it’s clean. Just lend me the money, d.c.!
d.: How much do you owe Tom?
C.: Fifty bucks.
d.: So, you’re willing to spend ten times what you owe your bookie to pay him back? I’ll lend you the fifty bucks, Cal.E. Just forget about the publisher.
C.: Thanks, d.c. I’ll pay you back as soon as my numbers hit in the lottery.
d.: I say, I think, I’ve been hornswoggled; hornswoggled, I say!
Comments