C.: The exciting adventures of THE most adorable talking cat on this or ANY planet and her boring human sidekick…
d.: What are you doing, Cal.E.?
C.: I am trying to think of an accurate tagline for our blog! So far, this is the best one that I have been able to come up with.
d.: Perhaps I could be of help. Let’s see, the musings and observations of one of the world’s few talking cats and her intelligent, handsome, charismatic host.
C.; It’s called Cal.E.’s Corner, d.c. NOT d.c.’s dimwitted dawdling!
d.: Well, since I am the one who can type, I get to make up the words for the tagline for OUR blog!
C.: Have you forgotten modern technology, d.c.? I can talk into my computer, and it will type whatever I say. For instance: Cal.E. the Cat is a curious concoction of feline femininity and forthright, fantastic foresight into the issues of the day! (Exclamation point, new paragraph).
d.: Yes, but you must tell the computer each punctuation mark, as well as each word to type. I can type faster than you can talk into the computer. Just let me handle this!
While these two are arguing about who oversees writing their blog, we take you back to planet HTRAE, Earth’s mirror planet. On this planet, Buddy Bones is an evil genius who is trying to come up with a plan to invent a perpetual motion machine and take over the planet by eliminating all other energy sources. His plan may work, since all HTRAE’s energy sources are contributing to increasing the hole in the ozone layer of the atmosphere. This makes for unpleasant and unusual weather patterns. It is the middle of July, and HTRAE is experiencing a heat wave in its northern hemisphere. It is the middle of winter on Earth’s mirror planet
However, the evil genius has encountered one major complication. His mathematician, ELAC has taken a three-month sabbatical to take care of her sick kittens. Dr. Bones is now obligated to do the math formulas, as well as the mechanical work for his project himself. He believes that he has competition for his invention, so he is on a tight timeline. As a result, he has not slept for three days. He has been working around the clock for the last seventy-two hours, and he is beginning to tire.
BB.: If that irritating cat, ELAC can do these calculations for my perpetual motion machine, Maybe I can as well. Then, I will not be obligated to share any of my profits with anyone else! It will all be mine, all MINE!!! (and there are some Puerto Rican girls that are just DYING to meet you! NO, I must concentrate. The Rolling Stones lyrics have no place in math!) Let’s see, the square root of pi is an irrational number (like each and every cat and human I have ever encountered) so how was Cal.E. able to multiply an irrational number by the largest number ever identified by mathematicians? Hmm. She carried out the first number to sixteen candles (John Cryer and Mollie Ringwald, circa 1984… must concentrate) er digits and multiplied by a computer search engine… I mean the largest number known to humans, dogs, or cats.
No, no, that CAN NOT be right! The answer cannot be THAT obvious, can it? I will just let my brain cool off and read the local newspaper. It looks as though no one has answered my human servant’s riddle. What two things do the states of Washington and Texas have in common? Each is solvent, and neither has a state income tax. But what about the other four states: New York, New Jersey, Illinois, and California. Ah, yes. This is elementary. I suppose that I should just do without sleep from now on! The answer is so obvious now! They each…..
Can you answer this question before Dr. Bones does? Leave a comment in the comment section if you can. Tomorrow, Dr. Bones will give the rest of the answer to the question.
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