Buddy Bones: Now, let’s see. The area of an equilateral triangle is… no, no, that’s not right. What was I thinking? It is an isosceles triangle., not an equilateral one. Yes, that is better. If I calculate the distance from planet Earth to Polaris, then multiply it by the square root of pi, (which is an irrational number, just like every cat I have ever known {he,he}), hmm. I must carry out my answer to sixteen digits to make this work.
It is a good thing that my humans think that I am not very bright. If they thought that I was smart, they would try to find a job for me, like they did for that annoying cat, Cal.E. and her kittens. With my sensitive nose, I would be able to sniff out illegal drugs and paraphernalia at The Human Kennel. I would be obligated to work long hours and do as I was told all day long! That would leave me little or no time to expound on my theories. A lack of time would seriously impede my progress toward eliminating all other energy sources, except my perpetual motion machine.
Dogs only live for about fifteen years, if they are small or medium-sized breeds. I have seen thirteen springs, so I must hurry and get my work done if I am going to enjoy the fruit of my labor! Two years (or as many as the dumb cat my humans think is so smart can count) is not a lot of time for me to enjoy world domination, even in dog years. I have no offspring to pass along my vast knowledge, nor my potential immense wealth that I will acquire once I perfect both my calculations and techniques. That means that I must spend all resources I acquire in a short period of time. It will be both joyful and stressful simultaneously to try to such a thing. I am probably the only being on the face of the earth who is intelligent enough to do it, though, but I must concentrate. My time is scant, and Cal.E. and her kittens will be home from work soon.
My humans are on another cruise, so Cal.E.’s friend, d.c. scot will be coming over to check on Cal.E., her kittens, the other two cats in our household and me in a few hours. I must work quickly and… EUREKA! I have found the secret! It is not the answer to being able to invent a perpetual motion machine, but my calculations have allowed me to invent something just as valuable! I have discovered how I can fly without getting into an airplane or a helicopter! I will be able to fly, if I just flap my ears and believe I CAN fly!
This may take a few minutes, though
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