Cal.E.'s Korner

d.: (Knock knock, knock) Calculating Einstein Katt. (Knock knock knock) Calculating Einstein Katt. (knock knock knock) Calculating Einstein Katt. CAL.E, OPEN THIS DIGN DANG DOOR NOW!!

Oh, hi Cal.E.

C.: Hello, ma’am, sir, or nonbinary individual…d.c.? Why are you wearing one of Eudora’s dresses?

d.: Well, when you invited me to Wayne Manor

for your and T.’s Fourth of July/Victory party/End of Animal Olympics celebration here at Wayne Manor, you said the attire was “casual dress.” This is the only dress Eudora has that will fit me. Is it too formal for this party?

C.:….N—N-Never, never mind, d.c. Come on in. It’s still a little early, so most of the guests haven’t arrived.

d.: But I see that you enlisted the help of the big guys.

C.: Yes. My third husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo(who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken doesn’t want any people or animals consuming drugs in our sand box.

d.: Where is T?

C.: Well, he and the Electrifying, Lively Awesome Cat fighter otherwise known as ELAC, The Space Cat Who Is The Champion Cat Fighter of Three Different Galaxies

are locked into a two-and one-half day battle of Pong! At the Animal Olympics. This match is believed to be the longest Pong match

of all time between a six-time WACKO cat fighting champion and a space cat who’s the intergalactic cat fighting champion of three different galaxies, so they don’t want to stop the match and declare it a draw. They want to make sure that this record stands for a long time.

d.: I would think that it would only take about thirty seconds to set that record. I’m not sure than a Pong match fitting that description has ever been played.

C.: Probably not, but my third husband and my thirty-second cousin twice removed (and mirror opposite) are such perfectionists that neither wants to concede the match. They’ve put two and one-half days of effort into this match, taking time out for naps, sand box breaks and to eat, of course. (ring).

Oh, excuse me d.c. Just mingle with the other guests. The crowed is a little sparse

because it's still early

This is T, and he probably only has about ninety seconds to talk to me before the match resumes.

“Oh, hi T. It’s good to hear from you. How is the Pong match with my thirty-second cousin twice removed…It is? Who won? Wow! I must tell everyone here at our celebration.

“Hey everyone, T.’s on the phone and he says that the longest Apong match in history is over, and the winner was….

d.: Well, that’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow so you won’t feel like a

at the water cooler tomorrow when everyone is discussing the longest Pong match in history between a six-time World Association of Cat fighting and Knowledge of Ornithology and a space cat who’s the cat fighting champion of three different galaxies; right her on Cal.E.’s Korner.