C.: (I must call d.c. and see why he changed the beginning of my manuscript so drastically) (ring).
d.: This is the author and nurse d.c. scot. If you feel you have reached this number in error, please hang up and try again. If you have not reached this number in error, please leave a message at the (beep).
C.: Hi, d.c., it’s Cal.E. and….
d.: oh, hi, Cal.E, why are you calling on this, the day before Christmas.
C.: Oo, you were listening to the message I was going to leave the whole time?
D.: Yes, why?
C.: Why don’t you just answer your phone?
d.: Well, I was hoping that you were either an publisher or a literary agent…
C.: Then, wouldn’t it be a good idea to answer the phone?
d.: No, not really. I don’t want to appear to be too anxious.
C.: Well, okay. Speaking of anxious, your new beginning to my manuscript has me baffled.
d.: Would you care to elaborate?
C.: Yes. It has me confused, concerned, confounded and, contrary to popular belief, bewildered.
d.: You couldn’t think of another synonym that began with C, could you?
C.: Well…no, but that’s not my point. You always say show, don’t tell. That’s what I thought I was doing with my opening paragraph to my manuscript.
d.: Cal.E., it’s really “show and tell”,,,
C.: I’m not in obedience school anymore, d.c. I have a Doctorate in Playing and Hiding from the College of the Cat Skills online program.
d.: In a course that your husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken took and passed the final exam for you.
C.:Well, be that as it may, I’m still confused.
d.: Well, let me put it this way. Publishers want the same thing only different, like the soft drink, Seven Up.
C.: I don’t follow.
d.: Oh, right. You didn’t grow up on this planet. Seven Up is a soft drink that has a similar taste to another soft drink, but with a little more carbonation. In the seventies…
C.: Do you mean the nineteen seventies, in the last century, one hundred years ago?
d.: Well, it was in the last century, but more like fifty years ago, Seven Up had a commercial in which the soda claimed to be, “the same thing only different.”
C.: So, the creative designers had a talking soft drink spout some nonsense about being similar but different? What kind of drugs were they on? Maybe they should have listened to the big guys.
d.: Well, the point of the commercial is that a soft drink can be similar to another soft drink, but have subtle differences that make the soft drink unique. Do you follow?
C.: Yes, I’m supposed to eat catnip until I think of some ridiculous catch for my manuscript that will help it sell.
d.: No, not exactly. Just follow my lead and you’ll be just fine.
C.: d.c., how many books have you sold?
d.:... That’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.
Comentarios