C.: (ring) Hey, d.c., thanks for sending in the big guys to keep me from relapsing. I really shouldn’t eat catnip, and I know that. I would have felt like a
if I'd relapsed. However, the big guys aren’t necessary because I’ve got another job that pays more than working at The Kennel.
This gig’s at night, so I don’t need help staying awake since cats are nocturnal.
d.: That’s great Cal.E. May I ask what kind of employment this is?
C.: Yes, I’m going back into the entertainment industry. It’s a good gig, and I get to work with my husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. the Cat fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Tripe T Was Already Taken.
d.: That’s good, Cal.E., Are you and he going back into the ring as a tag team heavy
weight cat fighting duo?
C.: No, although T holds belts in five different categories of cat fighting, this isn’t as dangerous as doing that.
d.: So what are y’all dong, then?
C.: My caterwauling band, the RoCKats, got a gig filling in for a famous band.
d.: What group is it, Kiss, Yes, my neighbor’s band, Z.Z. Topp?
C.: No, we’re filling in for HUG.
d.; ??? I’ve never hear of HUG.
C.: Well, my friends Hebert, Umberto and Guillermo have a Mariachi band.
They don’t want to perform without their lead singer, Hebert, who has laryngitis.
d.: Why don’t they want to perform without Hebert?
C.: Because then they would just be UG. That’s not a good name for a band…
d.: Or anything else, for that matter.
C.: Yes, that’s true. Especially since they just got a contract with ADIDAS.
d..: Oh? That’s great. It should pay well. Are they going to split the money with you, or let you keep all the profits?
C.: We get to keep all the profits for playing in back allies in Anahuac, Denton, Indian Springs, Dickinson, Ackerly, and Sabinal. You should come watch us perform. I have the most important part.
d.: What part is that?
C.: Well, T sings lead,
the RoCKats play most of the music,
but I have the last note on every song. In what city do you think you can watch us?
d.:…That’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.
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