See him wasted on the sidewalk, in his jacket and his jeans
Wearin' yesterday's misfortunes like a smile
Once he had a future full of money, love and dreams
Which he spent like they was goin' out of style
And he keeps right on a-changin' for the better or the worse
Searchin' for a shrine he's never found
Never knowin' if believin' is a blessin' or a curse
Or if the goin' up was worth the comin' down
He's a poet
He's a picker
He's a prophet
He's a pusher
He's a pilgrim and a preacher and a problem when he's stoned
He's a walkin' contradiction
Partly truth and partly fiction
Taking every wrong direction on his lonely way back home
He has tasted good and evil in your bedrooms and your bars
And he's traded in tomorrow for today
Runnin' from his devils, lord and reachin' for the stars
And losin' all he loves along the way
But if this world keeps right on turnin' for the better or the worse
And all he ever gets is older and around
From the rockin' of the cradle to the rollin' of the hearse
The goin' up was worth the comin' down
He's a poet
He's a liar
He's a prophet
He's a dreamer
He's a pilgrim and a preacher and a problem when he's stoned
He's a walkin' contradiction
Partly truth and partly fiction
Taking every wrong direction on his lonely way back home
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Kris Kristofferson
The Pilgrim lyrics © Resaca Music Publishing Co.
C.: d.c., are you okay?
d.: Yes, why wouldn’t I be, Cal.E.?
C.: Oh, no reason, other than you got thrown down a set of stairs into a trap door to, well, I don’t know where yesterday.
d.: Oh, that. That was a mannequin that was dressed up to look like me. You must admit, though, it was good theater.
C.: Yes, by now, everyone knows that cat fighting is just done for entertainment purposes. That cable pay- per-view got a higher rating of any cat fight broadcast on ASPN, I understand.
d.: Yes, it got a 0.0000062% market share. That’s the highest-rated cat fight of all time, and your husband was partially responsible for that.
C.: And so were you. Since you waxed so wisely on the television broadcast yesterday, d.c., I wanted to ask you for some advice.
d.: About what?
C.: Well, I’m applying for an upper management position at The Kennel…
d.: I thought that you were already in upper management.
C.: This is an upper, upper management position. I’m applying for the position of Financial Investigative Director of the Organization…
d.: Why do you want the FIDO position? I hear that they work you like a dog at that job.
C.: Yes, I’ll need to investigate all the financial transactions at The Kennel. Since I can only count to two, that may pose a problem. I need your help to make my resume more…desirable for this position.
d.: Actually, I would be truthful, Cal.E.
C.: Because I may get caught and, according to the information in one of your books, THE MAGRUDER MYSTERIES PRECISION: A CRIME OF PASSION, the maximum penalty for falsifying legal documents is twenty years in The Kennel without a chance for being paroled early?
d.: It’s not that, Cal.E. If the authorities know that you can only count to two, they’ll probably hire you…
C.: Why is that, since I would need to count into the millions to hold this job?
d.: Because, then the people at The Kennel could make up their own numbers and turn them in, and you’d never be able to contradict what they say, since you’re not able to count any higher than two.
C.: And, you don’t think that the person already holding the job is better at counting than I am, d.c.?
d.: …Well, that’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cl.E.’s Korner.
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