Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Make me, oh, make me, Lord, more than I am Make a piece in your master game plan Free from the earthly temptation below I've got the will, Lord, if you've got the toe
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Bring on the brothers who've gone on before And all of the sisters who've knocked at your door All the departed, dear loved ones of mine And stick 'em up front in the offensive line
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Yeah, dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Paul Charles Craft
Dropkick Me Jesus lyrics © Screen Gems-emi Music Inc., Black Sheep Music
C.: ( Psst...Get your feet off the coffee table, Tucker. You're too big. You're going to break the legs off of it, and then, I'll break the legs off of you... oh).
Well, we’re back here on Cal.E.’s Korner with a very special cat: the five-time heavyweight cat fighting champion of the world and my new husband, Tucker Tucker Two. Tucker’s the cat fighting champion formerly known as “The Tuxedo.” Tucker, why don’t you go by your former nickname anymore?
Tux.: Because “The Tuxedo” was a mean cat. I’m now more into peace and love and all that drivel, since I married you.
C.: Yes, well… they may not be a good thing, since you’ve decided to resume your cat fighting career. What name are you going to go by, now that you’ve abandoned your former moniker, may I ask?
Tux: You just said it.
C.: Said what?
Tux: The Champion Cat Fighter Formerly Known as The Tuxedo. That’s my new cat fighting nickname.
C.: Okay, sure. Speaking of names, you have an interesting one. How did you come to be named Tucker Tucker Two?
Tux: Well, my dad’s name is Tucker Tucker, and I wanted to honor him, now that he’s gone to visit the great cat upstairs.
C.: I’m sorry, Tucker, I was under the impression that your dad was still among the living. That’s why I assumed that you put the “Two” at the end of your name.
Tux: My dad is still alive. He just went to visit my uncle, his brother. He lives in the apartment above the one where my dad lives. He’s a great big cat, even bigger than me!
C.: Okay, well, let’s talk about your career. You’re a meowionnaire, and I have two jobs, and we’re cats. We don’t need any more money, so why are you returning to the ring to cat fight, risking your life and your well-being? I mean, some cat my dropkick you through the goalpost of life, if you’re not careful.
Tux: Again, to honor my dad. He said that, whatever I choose to do, to do it well, and never quit.
C.: That’s admirable. What does your father do? Is he a champion mouser, or something like that?
Tux: No, he just eats and sleeps all day, but he’s really good at it. He’s never quit doing it since the day he was born.
C.: Well, I see, from the clock on the wall…that we still have plenty more time, and you’re my last guest for tonight (heavy sigh). What would you like to talk about now, may I ask?
Tux: I would like to talk about my new product, Cal.E., it’s…
d.: Well, that’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.
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