Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Make me, oh, make me, Lord, more than I am Make a piece in your master game plan Free from the earthly temptation below I've got the will, Lord, if you've got the toe
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Bring on the brothers who've gone on before And all of the sisters who've knocked at your door All the departed, dear loved ones of mine And stick 'em up front in the offensive line
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Yeah, dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life End over end, neither left, nor the right
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Paul Charles Craft
Dropkick Me Jesus lyrics © Screen Gems-emi Music Inc., Black Sheep Music
C.: Well, d.c. has an all-day doctor’s appointment, so he asked me to write the blog by myself today. However, I’m supposed to be getting ready for my wedding to Tucker Tucker Two this Saturday. The rehearsal and rehearsal dinner are tomorrow, and I have a lot of work to do. But first, I want to work on my new series of novels. The protagonist of my series is a hard-boiled detective named Lance (Hard) Boil. Here is the first chapter or the first book.
Lance: Puppy, stop that or I’ll shoot you with this water gun.
Puppy: Growl!
Lance: Okay, puppy, you asked for it. One squirt of water right in the snout.
Puppy: Yowl! I’ll be good from now on!
And she was. The end.
I think I’ll email d.c. my masterpiece. Maybe he can find a publisher for me by tomorrow. That way, I can go on a book tour and not be available for my wedding. The best part is that I won’t even need to leave the planet. (ring) Oh, it’s d.c. “Hi, d.c., did you get my masterpiece?
d.: I did.
C.: Well, do you think that you can find me a publisher or at least an agent by tomorrow so that I can go on a book tour and not be obligated to marry Tucker Tucker Two this Saturday?
d.: I don’t think so, Cal.E.
C.: Why not?
d.: Because it doesn’t work that quickly and…
C.: In this age of instant access, why can’t you find me someone to buy my book and give me a contract in the next two days? I want to go on a book tour now, now, now!
d.: For several reasons. First, it may take up to six months to get an answer once you submit a manuscript to a publisher or an agent. Even if a publisher asks for the full manuscript, there is still only about a one in three chance that the book will get published. The second problem is the book itself…
C.: What’s wrong with my book?!!
d.: Well, you have a protagonist and an antagonist, that’s good. You also have a beginning and an end, so that’s good. However, you need a middle…
C.: I thought the middle was just filler, anyway. I got to the point quickly and efficiently…
d.: But people aren’t going to pay a premium price for this short of a book. In the middle of the book, we need to learn each character’s motivation. Is the puppy disobedient because she had a mean owner who made her do things that got her in trouble with other people? And does Lance like dogs, or is he punishing the puppy because he was terrorized by another dog in his youth? And is the act he’s punishing the puppy for a natural thing that all puppies do, or is it something that will harm the puppy, Lance, or other people? Also, you can add to the end. Was this the only time that the puppy obeyed Lance, or did the puppy always submit to Lance’s authority from then on?
Since psychology plays a big role in human’s lives, we want to know what happens in other people’s (and animal’s) lives that make them act the way they do,
C.: Well, as you’ve said many times, writing is rewriting. I suppose that I should hole up all weekend and come up with a better plot for my manuscript. So, I suppose I’ll miss my wedding this weekend. An artist must suffer for her craft, though.
d.: Well, that’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.
Tune in tomorrow and see if Cal.E. misses her own wedding rehearsal, or she comes up with a plot to her novel quickly enough to attend the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. And, if she doesn’t, will Tucker and Tom hunt her down like a common criminal and end her existence by dropkicking her through the goalposts of life?
C.:???!!!
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