C.: Thanks for letting me use your internet connection to send my report to my boss at The Kennel, d.c. Dad came over and finished the email to our internet supplier at one minute until noon, so our internet should be working by tomorrow. I am glad, since training all my kittens to do my old job at the kennel is taking a lot of time and effort.
d.: No problem, Cal.E. BTW, how are your kittens doing at their new jobs?
C.: On a 0-10 scale?
d.: Yes.
C.: Honestly, if there was any way to give them a number that was LESS than zero, I would. Since I can only count to two, that is the number I have assigned to each one. Honestly, they all seem to think the world owes them a living wage for doing nothing! I think they all want to go into politics!
d.: So, they are not working out? Why not just fire them and get some new workers?
C.: I would, but there ARE no more workers. The management at The Kennel wants them to succeed so badly that they are ignoring my low grades for my kittens. I think that numbers are more important to them than the ability of their workers to do their jobs. The Kennel is required by law to have so many cage cleansers per animal. With all fourteen of my kittens "working," The Kennel has fulfilled that obligation.
Honestly, this job is NOT rocket science! All I need for them to learn how to do is clean cages every few hours. ANYONE should be able to learn to do that. My kittens are just not motivated. Tom spoiled them for too long, because he felt guilty that they did not have a dad AND a mom. I am fresh out of ideas. Do you have any idea how to make my kittens at least minimally productive?
d.: Well, CAl.E., do you remember when you first started your job? YOU were not very motivated. Then, The Kennel came up with that new pay plan, and you tried to figure out how to make more money from it. I think that is when you started drinking your "special" beet juice. It must have worked! You were promoted quickly after that, and you have maintained your productivity. I don't know what your secret ingredient is, but it worked for both of us, so maybe it will work for your kittens!
C.: I guess it is worth a try. I need to mix up the right amount for each kitten according to his or her weight. That will keep them from overdosing. It is potent stuff! Let's see, multiply the kitten's weight by the square root of pi, divide by two and multiply by 1,000 mcg.'s. Okay, I think I have it. I will put the "special" beet juice in each kitten's morning meal without their knowledge. Wish me luck!
d: It sounds like you need all the luck and help you can get. I will be off tomorrow, but call me and let me know how it is going when you get a chance!
C.: Will do, d.c. TTFN
d.: Okay, Cal.E. Tata for now!
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