d.: I guess I will be doing this blog solo today, since Cal.E. is not due to be back from Mississippi...Cal.E., what are you doing here?
C.: My last day at the kennel in Mississippi was reserved to do a study on ignorance and apathy being the two main causes of humans being incarcerated.
d.: What happened?
C.: I couldn't find any inmates who cared about the study who were smart enough to understand how to answer my questions correctly!
d.: O-KAY. Cal.E., why do you have on your running shoes? And why are you listening to Survivor on your phone?
Rising up, back on the street Did my time, took my chances Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet Just a man and his will to survive So many times it happens too fast You change your passion for glory Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past You must fight just to keep them alive It's the eye of the tiger It's the thrill of the fight Rising up to the challenge of our rival And the last known survivor Stalks his prey in the night And he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger Face to face, out in the heat Hanging tough, staying hungry They stack the odds 'til we take to the street For the kill with the skill to survive It's the eye of the tiger It's the thrill of the fight Rising up to the challenge of our rival And the last known survivor Stalks his prey in the night And he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger Rising up straight to the top Had the guts, got the glory Went the distance, now I'm not going to stop Just a man and his will to survive It's the eye of the tiger It's the thrill of the fight Rising up to the challenge of our rival And the last known survivor Stalks his prey in the night And he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger The eye of the tiger The eye of the tiger The eye of the tiger The eye of the tiger Source: Musixmatch Songwriters: Peterik James M / Sullivan Frank Michael
Eye of the Tiger lyrics © Wb Music Corp., Sony/atv Melody, Easy Action Music
C.: When I came home from the kennel in Mississippi, I felt energetic, so I mowed Mom and Dad's yard. After that, I cleaned the whole house and washed all of my clothes AND their clothes, as well as the dishes. Then, I sat down and balanced my checkbook. Now, I am going for a ten mile run! Come with me, d.c. You would only need to run five miles to equal my ten; because you only have two legs!
d.: I think that I will pass on the run, Cal.E. I am not in good enough shape to run that far yet. What makes you think that you can run ten miles? Have you been eating catnip again?
C.: No, d.c., I promise. I found something that is MUCH better. It is the greatest thing since your species discovered fire on this planet! A coworker in Mississippi gave me a new energy drink. I was dragging, so he shared his with me. It tastes awful, but it REALLY works. I was not only able to clean twice as many cages in one-half the time, but I also taught the Mississippi crew how to do it more efficiently. This stuff is great!
d.: What is it made of? (You do know that methamphetamines are illegal, right?)
C.: It is not crystal meth. This energy drink is pure beet juice! It speeds up one's metabolism, lowers one's blood pressure and resting heart rate, makes him or her sleep better, and will make me a millionaire.
d.: I think you may be getting carried away with this drink. It cannot make you money!
C.: It can if I SELL it! I am going to grow beets in Mom and Dad's backyard. I bought a juicer at Walmart to make beet juice with. I have practically no overhead, and I can sell these drinks at a premium price, once everyone knows how well it works! It is a fool-proof plan!
d.: Then why do I feel that this, like everything else you have tried while you were on this planet, will end badly?!
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