Cal.E.'s Korner

C.: Meow? Meow! Meow? MEOW!!

M.: Yawn. Meow meow meow meow meow

C.: So, are you awake now?

M.: Yes, and I thought you were singing the chorus to the anthem saluting me as the Supreme ruler of the Cat Galaxy.

C.: Those days are over, Meow. You are now a big, fat pet to an old lady on planet Earth. Your regime was overthrown and you were exiled just like you had me exiled several years ago because you lost the war to keep your power….

M.: No one wins in a war, Cal.E.

C.: That’s true. Anyway, you said you wanted to hear the rest of my story entitled A STRANGE PLANET. However, you slept through the whole day yesterday and most of today. I was just wanted to ask you if you wanted to hear the rest of the story.

M.: Ah, yes. We are still stuck in this five-star dump

until your third husband,

Tucker Tucker Two a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken (by his former BFF, co-founder and business partner in the Triple t Cartel, one-time World Association of Cat Fighting and Knowledge of Ornithology tag -team partner and now chief rival for his seven WACKO championship belts and now arch enemy, The Original Triple T, Tom the Tabby)

whom he may or may not have defeated for the middle weight WACKO cat fighting crown,

comes to pay our bill and take us home, so go ahead with our story.

C.: Okay here goes.

Horace and Hortense Huxby

adopted me, and I will always be thankful for that. However, I learned that many of the animals the Huxbys adopted got out of The Kennel on patrol. There were some interesting characters that fit that description, so d.c. and I decided to start writing our blog and talk about these animals. Here is an excerpt from our first blog post. let me get into character first, though.

C.: That there is the orneriest critter this side of the Pecos Boudreaux Boudreaux G-o-o-o-o-o-o-ly, better known as the notorious outlaw dog Buddy Bones.

M.: Cal.E., why are you using colloquial English when it’s usually well-educated humans who read your blog?

C.: Because we’re in Texas,

and that’s the way Texans talk.

M.: They do? That’s news to me. I never heard anyone in Houston talking like that…

C.: Anyways, Buddy Bones is a criminal mastermind. He once escaped from his kennel

and bit ten mailmen in one day. He then led a rebellion at The Kennel that resulted in fifty dogs getting loose.

who let the dogs out?

He’s a wearin’ that there letter carriers’ uniform as punishment for his crime. He must wear that there uniform every day for the rest o' his life. Well, that excludes weekends, holidays, every fourth Tuesday and ever second Monday of the month.

O’ course, I can’ show yas a picture o’ him, that’d be illegal. I just conjured up dis here pi’ture from a website…

M.: Without paying for it?

C.: Well….

M.: So, you’re just as bad as Buddy Bones

because you’re both criminals. The Huxbys were keeping a bunch of renegades. When I get back, I’ll give them a piece of my mind.

C.: Like you could afford to do that.

M.:WHAT/111

C.: Er, that’s all the time we have for today, folks; so that’s the end of this here cat ta(i)le.

Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.