Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the sun of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Make me, oh, make me, Lord, more than I am
Make a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly temptation below
I've got the will, Lord, if you've got the toe
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the sun of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Bring on the brothers who've gone on before
And all of the sisters who've knocked at your door
All the departed, dear loved ones of mine
And stick 'em up front in the offensive line
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the sun of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Straight through the sun of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
Yeah, dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life
End over end, neither left, nor the right
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Paul Charles Craft
Dropkick Me Jesus lyrics © Screen Gems-emi Music Inc., Black Sheep Music
d.: I sure do hope that it stops raining by next Wednesday. I need to water my yard then. Since I
don’t have an automatic sprinkler system. Maybe I should put one in, but in the meantime, I
would need to go out in this mess and move my sprinklers around. That would be…(ring)
“Oh, hi, Cal.E. What can I do for you today?”
C.: Don’t you remember what you said yesterday?
d.: I do, but just to make sure that we’re on the same page, why don’t you refresh my memory?
C.: You said that you wanted to sue the writers of my favorite soap opera, NINE LIVES TO GIVE
for stealing our script and dropkicking us script through the goalposts of life.
d.: Oh, yes, I remember… I mean that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. That’s why I called
you.
C.: No, d.c., I called you.
d.: When?
C.: NNnever mind. I just wanted you to know that my cousin, Penny, is set to try our case in civil
court. She has a 98% closing rate on her cases, so I think that we have a good chance to win.
d.: No lawyer has that high of a closing rate, Cal.E. That only happens in books and movies,
and then only when the lawyer has outside help, if you know what I mean.
C.: Well, Penny is new to the law game, but she shines at it, like a…
d.: New penny?
C.: Well…yes. Anyway, she said that she wouldn’t take money for our case. She’ll do it pro
bono.
d.: Is that Sonny’s brother?
C.: No, pro bono means…
d.: I know what it means. It essentially means that she’ll do it out of the goodness of her heart. I
feel that we must give her something to try this case, though.
C.: Penny doesn’t need the money…
d.: Because she has plenty of pennies?
C.: Something like that. If you want to give her something for her efforts, though, I have her on
the other line of my facetime app. Maybe you could show her around your house by phone and
let her choose what she wants you to give her. Hold on.
d.: Okay.
P.: I don’t really see anything that I want from your house, d.c. Except….
C.: That’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of
Cal.E.’s Korner.
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