Ever since I was a young boy
I've played the silver ball
From Soho down to Brighton
I must have played 'em all
But I ain't seen nothing like him
In any amusement hall
That deaf, dumb and blind kid
Sure plays a mean pinball
He stands like a statue
Becomes part of the machine
Feeling all the bumpers
Always playing clean
He plays by intuition
The digit counters fall
That deaf, dumb and blind kid
Sure plays a mean pinball
He's a pinball wizard
There has got to be a twist
A pinball wizard's
Got such a supple wrist
How do you think he does it? I don't know
What makes him so good?
Ain't got no distractions
Can't hear no buzzers and bells
Don't see no lights a-flashin'
Plays by sense of smell
Always gets a replay
Never seen him fall
That deaf, dumb and blind kid
Sure plays a mean pinball
I thought I was
The Bally table king
But I just handed
My pinball crown to him
Even on my favorite table
He can beat my best
His disciples lead him in
And he just does the rest
He's got crazy flipper fingers
Never seen him fall
That deaf, dumb and blind kid
Sure plays a mean pinball
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Peter Townshend
Pinball Wizard lyrics © Abkco Music Inc., Royalty Network, Spirit Music Group, Universal Music Publishing Group, Warner Chappell Music, Inc
C.: d.c., T and I need your help.
d.: What do you and your husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) NOw Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken need help with, Cal.E.?
C.: We need to sharpen our Pong! playing skills.
d.: I thought that T’s injury had heeled, and y’all would be able to cat fight as a tag team. Why do y’all need to sharpen your skills playing Pong!?
C.: That’s all true, but a pinball wizard has challenged us to a Pong! tournament.
d.: Is he deaf, dumb and blind?
C.: No, why?
d.: Just asking. Anyway, how much is it worth if y’all win? I mean, is it worth curtailing your cat fighting training?
C.: Let’s just say that T can make it worth your while if you can get me to his level playing Pong! We’ll just need to use your free-standing Pong! game and your expertise.
d.: Okay, I’m in. When did y’all want to start?
C.: T wanted to start tonight when you get home from work, but I must fill in for Ralph at The Kennel.
d.: I thought that his tour with Beauty and the Glowfish was over.
C.: It is. They had their epic tour of the southwestern part of Southeast Texas. They played their NIke tour: Navasota, Indian Hills, Kemp and Eagle Lake, but Ralph’s bass playing caught the eye of another band. Since he didn’t sign a contract, he decided to go on tour with OCDC.
d.: Yes, not everyone can play a fish as a musical instrument, so Ralph’s skill was impressive, I’m sure.
C.: d.c., you know as well as I do that Ralph plays a stringed instrument. There is one problem with Obnoxious Cantankerous Destructive Cats, though.
d.: What’t the problem with Ralph’s new band, Cal.E.?
C.: Well, the band practices long and hard, and have gotten really good at playing their instruments. However, the can’t seem to stop playing the first chord of the first song.
d.: That’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner
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