It's late in the evening She's wondering what clothes to wear She puts on her makeup And brushes her long blonde hair And then she asks me "Do I look all right?" And I say, "Yes, you look wonderful tonight" We go to a party And every one turns to see This beautiful lady Who's walking around with me And then she asks me "Do you feel all right?" And I say, "Yes, I feel wonderful tonight" I feel wonderful because I see the love light in your eyes Then the wonder of it all is that you just don't realize How much I love you It's time to go home now And I've got an aching head So I give her the car keys And she helps me to bed And then I tell her As I turn out the light I say, "My darling you were wonderful tonight" "Oh, my darling, you were wonderful tonight"
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Eric Clapton Wonderful Tonight lyrics © Warner/chappell Music International Ltd., Eric Patrick Clapton, E C Music Ltd
d.: What I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in this area. We’re looking for TDCJ C.O. Jonathon Smythe: Caucasian male in his early sixties. Approximately 6 feet, one inch tall; approximate weight is 176 pounds with sandy blond hair. He’s missing his left arm from his elbow down and walks with a distinctive limp, so he should be easy to find. The TDCJ has authorized the use of this feline and her fourteen kittens to use their sense of smell and acute hearing to apprehend this alleged criminal.
C.: (They have?)
d.: Are there any questions?
C.: Just one. What’s an outhouse?
d.: It’s like an outside litter box for humans. It’s what we used before indoor plumbing became available. Are there any more questions?
C.: You would be old enough to know that, wouldn't you,d.c? Why did you bring the task force from The Kennel into our neighborhood?
d.: Because I thought about what you said. Officer Smythe hasn’t shown up for work since you overheard the two inmates talking about him being a criminal. Additionally, neither his wife nor any of his children have heard or seen him in the last two days. I think that you and the inmate may be correct, Cal.E. Smythe is a criminal and needs to be brought to justice!
C.: But you’re a nurse, d.c. Isn’t it against the rules for you to get caught up in a criminal investigation where you work?
d.: If it involves the inmates, yes. That’s whom we’re contracted to treat. However, if it involves another member of the staff at The Kennel, I’m allowed to investigate the situation, and so are you. That’s why I asked for three days leave for both of us as well as all of your kittens, so you can use your nose and find Smythe. Now, it’s time to get to work.
C.: Let’s think about this, shall we? I’m the one Smythe is probably after, and I have the most sensitive nose. My nose is even better than the bloodhounds and the labs The Kennel uses to track escaped inmates. Additionally, I can outrun you and everyone else here, so I’ll be the first one to find Smythe. When he sees me, he’ll probably want to harm or do away with me altogether. You know that my kittens aren’t going to find him before I do. I don’t think it’s safe for me to go on this manhunt, but T.J. is trained for this. I think he should be the one cat doing the hunting for Officer Smythe. That would be the most efficient thing to do.
d.: Cal.E., the officers and I will be with you the whole time. They’re all armed with… well, mace, because the one weapon we have at our kennel needed to be used to transport an inmate to Galveston to have his teeth cleaned. He has very sensitive teeth, so he must be put under anesthesia to have that done, but he wants it done this week. He’s being paroled into the free world next week and he wants the state to pay for his teeth cleaning, since he claims to be destitute.
Also, T. J. has a cold and won’t be of much use. You’ll need to lead your kittens in this search, Cal.E. We’ll all be right behind you, as soon as we eat lunch, take a nap, see what’s on T.V. tonight…
C.: Well, it looks like it’s up to me to find this dangerous criminal, so I’d better start getting prepared. That’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.
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