Cal.E.'s Korner

C.: d.c., why are you so late calling me today?

d.: Well,  I went to the gym, and I couldn’t find a parking space close to it, so I circled around the parking lot until someone left who had a space close to the gym—

C,: I see, so it was a weight-lifting day?

d.: No, it was both a cardio and weightlifting day. Anyway, when I got into the gym, I decided to work out on the stair master, but there was only one left, and another guy I was in the locker room beat me to it. Of course, I didn’t know that was what he wanted to do, or I would have ridden the elevator like he did.

C.: So, the guy rode the elevator to the second floor, where the cardio and weightlifting equipment is, and then got on the Stairmaster?!

d.: Yes. I took the stairs. I thought that would be a good warmup for the Stairmaster,  I ran up and down the stairs so many times doing my warmup that I didn’t have the energy to get on the Stairmaster after that---

C.: So, you just lifted weights?

d.: No, I rode thirty miles on the stationary bike,  then I lifted weights

and got in the sauna and hot tup to work out the lactic acid in my legs.

C.: I see. d.c., did it dawn on you that maybe running up and down the stairs so many times was a good enough cardio workout? Then, you could have just gone and lifted weights and wouldn’t have so much lactic acid building up in your legs.

d.:….Anyway, we were talking about  you, or, more accurately, your third husband, (and second here on earth) the now eight-time World Association of Ca -fighting and Knowledge or Ornithology Tucker Tucker Two,

a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken (by his former BFF, co-founder of the Triple T Cartel and business partner, WACKO tag-team cat-fighting partner and former chief rival for his eight WACKO championship belts and former nemesis in real life whom he defeated to claim the WACKO middle weight cat fighting title

The Original Triple T, Tom the Tabby,

now BFF again,

T.’s a me a meow-illionaire,

so I suppose he bought Wayne Manor with cash. How, though, did he talk to people at his bank, as well as those selling the estate, without them realizing that they were talking to a cat?! Didn’t he do most of his business on Facetime?

C.: He did, but you, of all people, should know the answer to that question.

d.: ????

C.: Well, is that really my picture you show on our blog?

d.: No, and most of the pictures are stock photos—

C.: Because, when we started the blog, I was living with my human mom and dad

who were fostering criminal cats (like T) before he went ligit.,

and criminal dogs like Buddy Bones.

You couldn’t show their pictures because then one of their victims may come after one of them. I suppose you decided to keep doing that. My question is why? T had a reason to just show a picture of s human when he was talking to his bankers and potential sellers on Facetime.

I suppose he owes me something for teaching him to speak English.; but you’re a human. Why don’t you ever show your face on our blog?

d.: ….That’s all the time we have for today, folks. That’s the end of this cat ta(i)le.

Please join us next time for another edition of Cal.E.’s Korner