C.: d.c.is late. He must be still be working. I will call him and see where he is.
d.: Hello? Cal.E., is that you?
C.: Yes, d.c. it is me., Cal.E., the last of the talking cats.
d.: Okay, Cal.E., What’s up?
C.: You were supposed to say, “Stay alive! I will find you!” don’t you recognize the line from “The Last of the Mohicans?”
d.: I do now. I guess that I am just tired. I had to work even longer than I thought I would.
C.: Why was that?
d.: Well, in addition to teaching the day shift how to use the new EKG machine, I had a patient come in complaining of having a stomachache just as my shift was about to end. The dayshift nurses were trying to figure out the machine, so I had to take care of him.
C.: that does not sound fair. You were supposed to go home and get some rest!
d.: That is the way it is in healthcare. Whoever is available must treat the patient. This patient WAS annoying , though.
C.: Moreso than me? d.: Yes, Cal.E. MUCH more annoying than you are.
C.: Why?
d.: Because he wanted me to send him to the hospital for a stomachache he had for three days.
C.: What did you do?
d.: I gave him some Pepto Bismol and told him to only drink water for twenty-four hours. That usually works. It if does not, he needs to come back when the provider is at the Human Kennel.
C.: I usually just eat catnip. That makes me forget ALL my pain.
d.: Humans do not eat catnip, as a rule, but it may be worth a try!
C.: For your patient?
d.: No, for me. I am tired and frustrated. I need to get away from people who come into medical just because they have a little pain. In the free world, most of us do NOT go to the doctor if we just have a small amount of pain. WE try to deal with it ourselves. IF we cannot solve the problem with OTC meds., THEN we go to the doctor. ER’s are full now, though, because everyone with the sniffles is afraid they have Covid. If they do, the best thing to do is to stay at home and not infect anyone else. Omicron is basically just a bad cold, but the media has everyone so scared that…
C.: Here, d.c. take this.
d.: What is it?
C.: It is a chill pill. You will feel better after you take it.
d.: Is it legal?
C.: For me it is, but I’m a CAT.
d.: Thanks Cal.E. I feel better already…..zzzzz
C.: Another satisfied customer. The next time he asks for it, it will NOT be free, though.
Comments