I work all night, I work all day to pay the bills I have to pay Ain't it sad? And still there never seems to be a single penny left for me That's too bad In my dreams I have a plan If I got me a wealthy man I wouldn't have to work at all, I'd fool around and have a ball
Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world Money, money, money Always sunny In the rich man's world Aha All the things I could do If I had a little money It's a rich man's world It's a rich man's world
A man like that is hard to find but I can't get him off my mind Ain't it sad? And if he happens to be free I bet he wouldn't fancy me That's too bad So I must leave, I'll have to go To Las Vegas or Monaco And win a fortune in a game, my life will never be the same
Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world Money, money, money Always sunny In the rich man's world Aha All the things I could do If I had a little money It's a rich man's world
Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world Money, money, money Always sunny In the rich man's world Aha All the things I could do If I had a little money It's a rich man's world It's a rich man's world
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Benny Goran Bror Andersson / Bjoern K. Ulvaeus
Money, Money, Money lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Exploration Group LLC, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group
C.: Good evening, and welcome to Cal.E.’s Corner. I will be your host for the evening, Calculating Einstein Kat. My cohost, d.c. scot, is busy with one of his nursing jobs. He asked me to do this segment of our blog solo, since he is still one of the poor suckers who must WORK for a living. I have some information to share that I will NOT be sharing with d.c., so it is fortunate that he is not here.
You may notice that I am nattily attired this evening. That is because I am not only solvent now, but I am also flush with cash. I can afford to buy any clothing that I wish to wear. How did an apparent ne’er do well become solvent, you ask? It is simple.
I leveraged my assets against my considerable portfolio. Then, I opened a line of credit and borrowed money against it. Afterward, I entered a high-stakes, late-night game of cat, cat, dog (think duck, duck, goose). What those who bet on the dog did not know was that Gary the Greyhound was retired because he had lost his desire to race (as well as his will to live). I took my winnings from outrunning poor Gary and bet on the NCAA basketball Elite Eight games, picking every winner. This was an easy task.
You see, I sent Tom the Tabby a gift, that was supposedly a flea collar that was strong enough to combat the flea population in Tijuana. He did not know who sent it to him, since I sent it anonymously. He (mistakenly) thought someone who was looking out for his best interest sent the gift to him. Once he put the flea collar on, though, it was permanently attached to his neck. That supposed flea collar was really a tracking device that not only tracked Tom’s whereabouts, but also bugged his phone and tracked his keystrokes on his computer. That device gave me a LOT of information.
Tom has a lot of influence in the gambling world. He employs “Bob the Butcher,” a Bobtail Cat, to do his heavy lifting (see picture). “Bob the Butcher,” (or Bob) is a cross between a domesticated feline and a lynx. Tom took him in and gave him a home when he was down on his luck and out in the streets. Bob is so grateful that he will do whatever Tom tells him to do, such as scratch out the eyeballs of anyone who does not do what Tom tells him or her to do.
Tom called and emailed four teams before the basketball games. The hardest one to contact, though, was St. Peter’s coach. He apparently has an unlisted email address, along with a private cell phone number. THAT is why they won so many games, but I digress.
I bet against the teams Tom contacted and won my bets on each game. Now, I have enough money to pay Tom back, with interest, dress the part of a tycoon, AND buy my own type of insurance, a la Tom the Tabby.
I invested some of my winnings in buying a Liger. That is why I am not afraid to tell you about how I acquired my vast wealth. Leon has the best attributes of each of his parents. He has the strength of a lion and the quickness of a tiger. If any of you spill a word of this to Mom or Dad or d.c. he will…
Mom: AHHHH!!!!!! WHO LET THIS CREATURE INTO MY YARD?!!!!
C.: I MUST be on my way. Duty calls (me to disappear for now!)
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