Cal.E.'s Korner

Meow Z. Tongue: Cal.E., I’m looking at my social media accounts, and nothing that we did yesterday is on any of them.

C.: Or maybe it’s because we didn’t post anything yesterday.

M.: Sure, we did. Don’t you remember how we talked about how humans on this planet are generous, but gullible. Also, when they have disagreements that they can’t solve with civilized methods, like playing “Rock Paper, Scissors” until one of them wins, They start wars and drop bombs on other countries. It’s uncivilized if you ask me.

C.: Meow, there have been wars going on in the other side of the world for over 5,000 years. It’s just a way of life for some people in some countries. Getting involved in wars is how the inhabitants of this planet maintain a low population growth rate, I believe. Anyway, we don’t want to make this blog about politics, it’s supposed to be funny to relieve some of  the humans’ stress.

M.: Oh, no one will know what we’re talking about. Yesterday, I said that a cat would be able to discern the difference between a human’s voice and a computer generated one. Sccammers would never get any money out of a cat.

C.: True, but onlyu because most cats don't have any money, with a few exceptions.

M.: No, that's not it. It's because we have such acute hearing. It’s even better than a dog’s!

That’s just one way that cats are superior to dogs, humans, and all other animals. Cats on this planet are so advanced that they can get humans to do their every bidding.

Humans have no idea that they’re being manipulated by their pets. Even some dogs are smart enough to manipulate humans to go to work to earn money for their kibble and treats while the dog lays around the house, sleeping on the furniture and eating whenever s/he wants. It’s the perfect situation for cats and dogs.

C.: Except for those that are being abused. I agree that it’s a sweet situation for most pets, but I don’t think humans are as dumb as you think they are.

M.: So, you think humans are so benevolent that they treat animals with kindness out of the generosity of their hearts? I call dog ___

C.: Meow, this is a family blog. Please be careful of what you say.

M.: Oh, no one heard us yesterday, so we’re obviously in a hotel that has firewalls to keep us from broadcasting our blog…

C.:  What do you mean  by ‘Our blog’?!

M.: Oh, Cal.E., it’s obvious that you’ve been snowed by your human pal, d.c. scot.

He made you think that all humans are intellectually superior to cats because they speak one language. Big whoop! I speak three l

anguages and understand two more. That shows you how dumb humans are.

C.: (ring) Oh, hi, d.c. Meow Z. Tongue and I were just shooting the breeze. It’s funny that you would call when we were doing that…

d.: On my blog, meant for humans to read?!

C.: Well, our blog is named after me, but I thought that we were in a hotel with firewalls where we couldn’t be heard and our computer wouldn’t violate those firewalls….

You heard every word? Well, Meow thought that, since what he posted on our blog called didn’t get through the firewalls. He called his post Meow’s Musings.” Did you see that? You didn’t?

M.: ( Hmmm…Maybe I just thought all those things yesterday and never wrote them down.)

C.: MEOW!!! I'm gpoing to get you for this!

M.: Um..It looks like we’re out of time for today, folks; so that’s the end of this cat ta(i)e.

Please join us next time for “Meow’s Musings”…I mean Cal.E.’s Korner.

GTG