Death of an Unpopular Poet
Song by Jimmy Buffett
By: Jimmy Buffett1973
I once knew a poet
Who lived before his time
He and his dog Spooner
Would listen while he'd rhyme
Words to make ya happy
Words to make you cry
Then one day the poet suddenly did die
But he left behind a closet
Filled with verse and rhyme
And through some strange transaction
One was printed in the Times
And everybody's searchin'
For the king of undergound
Well they found him down in Florida
With a tombstone for a crown
Everybody knows a line
From his book that cost four ninety-nine
I wonder if he knows he's doin'
Quite this fine
'Cause his books are all best sellers
And his poems were turned to song
Had his brother on a talk show
Though they never got along
And now he's called immortal
Yes he's even taught in school
They say he used his talents
A most proficient tool
But he left all of his royalties
To Spooner his ol' hound
Growin' old on steak and bacon
In a doghouse ten feet 'round
And everybody wonders
Did he really lose his mind
No he was just a poet who lived before his time
He was just a poet who lived before his time
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Jimmy Buffett
Death of an Unpopular Poet lyrics © American Broadcasting Music, Inc
C.: Well, I might as well call d.c. on my intergalactic telecommunication device
and tell him what Meow Z. Tongue said. (ring)
d.: Hello, this is d.c. scot, nurse, author and lyricist. I am currently too frustrated to help you, because I am dealing with a program that is run by artificial intelligence. If you would like for me to call you back when I cool off, please leave your name, number, and a brief message and I’ll get back to you. (beep).
C.: Hi, d.c.
I thought that you might want to know that Meow Z. Tongue has offered one million Catovos for our manuscript, “A Strange Planet”…
d.: How much is that in American money? That’s the standard that all currencies on Earth are measured by. Is it worth one million American dollars?
C.: No.
d.: One billion, then?
C.: No.
d.: higher or lower?
C.: Lower.
d.: It’s not one million,,, one thousand, then?
C.: No.
d.: Then, one hundred dollars?
C.: No, not even ten American dollars. Catovos are worthless on Earth, as I found out when I was purchasing catnip there on your home planet. That’s why I was thrown into The Kennel….
d.: I thought that is was because of your addiction to catnip…
C.: Potato, patahto, Tomato, tomahto…
d.: Do you want to call the whole thing off?
C.: What?! No! Just finish my manuscript, please. I don’t have time with campaigning for Ruler of the Planet of the Talking Cats.
d.: I already did that. I guess I’ll at least get a byline after I re-edit the manuscript and completely rewrite it and the script is released on this planet. That should help me with my writing career, right Cal.E.?
C.: Well, that’s all the time we have for today, folks. I must get back to campaigning, so we’ll see you tomorrow right here on Cal.E.’s Korner. (Now, to see if the castaways ever get off Gilligan’s Island).
d.: RIP author, lyricist and musician Jimmy Buffet 1946-2023.
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