It's late in the evening
She's wondering what clothes to wear
She puts on her make up
And brushes her long blonde hair
And then she asks me, "Do I look alright?"
And I say, "Yes, you look wonderful tonight"
We go to a party
And everyone turns to see
This beautiful lady
That's walking around with me
And then she asks me, "Do you feel alright?"
And I say, "Yes, I feel wonderful tonight"
I feel wonderful
Because I see the love light in your eyes
And the wonder of it all
Is that you just don't realize how much I love you
It's time to go home now
And I've got an aching head
So I give her the car keys
She helps me to bed
And then I tell her, as I turn out the light
I say, "My darling, you are wonderful tonight"
Oh my darling, you are wonderful tonight
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Eric Clapton
Wonderful Tonight lyrics © Warner/chappell Music International Ltd., Eric Patrick Clapton, E C Music Ltd
Justice will not be served until those who are unaffected are as outraged as those who are.- Benjamin Franklin
C.:Oh, T., it’s almost time to go. Are you dressed yet?
T.: Almost. I just want to look my best for your human mom and dad and their guest, what was her name again?
C.: Yetta Näther. She’s the owner of the Scandinavian cruise line that Mom and Dad have been taking so many cruises on lately.
T.: Okay, I’m ready now.
Later that same night
(ding)
Horace: I’ll get the door, honey. I just finished bookingo our nesxt cruies. Just keep our guest, Yetta Näther entertained.
Well, how are you, Cal.E., and T.? Let me introduce you to our guest who owns the cruise line that we’ve been frequenting lately.
Yetta, this is our feline daughter, Calculating Einstein Katt, and her husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken.
C.: Charmed, I’m sure….
Yetta: You can talk?!!!
C.: er...Meow?
Horace: Oh, I think that our friend next door is playing a trick on us…d.c. is a really good ventriloquist.
Yetta: Well, it wouldn’t surprise me if both of these two could speak English.
I understand that you’ve both obtained your doctorate degrees from obedience school. That’s quite impressive.
T. Meow.
Yetta: How cute, big boy.
T.: No, I’m T, Big Boy lives next door…I mean meow?
Horace: Oh, that d.c. I must have a word with him later. Anyway, let’s adjourn to the formal dining room and have our favorite meal, bass.
C.: We’re going to eat a stringed instrument…I mean meow?
Horace: Oh, that d.c. I said BASS, as in the fish. While we’re eating, we can discuss the reason why we’re having this meal with our two favorite cats. Yetta?
Y.: Yes. It seems that my cruise line has been decimated by A. I. rodents, and they’re demanding ransom to keep them from chewing through the bottom of my cruise liner and sinking it if I don’t give them one million pounds of cheese.
Hortense: How did you receive the message, Yetta?
Y.: Well, my accountant was working on my payroll when a message popped up demanding one million pounds of cheese. It was obviously done by artificial intelligence, though, because all the spelling and grammar were impeccable in the note, so I know that it wasn’t done by a human, and I doubt that a real mouse could type. To emphasize the point that they were serious, the A.I. rodents chewed a hole through the deck of my ship and left a note saying that the bottom of the boat was next if I didn’t comply.
Horace: So, what I need from you two is for you to eat all the A.I. rodents. Can that be done? One meow for yes and two meows for no, please.
T.: Meow.
Yetta.: Okay, you and your wife have a job, big guy. It pays all the sea bass dinners you can eat for the rest of your lives, if you can get rid of these A.I. rodents.
d.:Tune in tomorrow, folks, and see if justice will be served to the A. I. rodents, and if I’m really a very good ventriloquist.
Comments