Picture you upon my knee
Just tea for two and two for tea
Me for you and you for me alone
Nobody near us
To see us or hear us
No friends or relations
On weekend vacations
We won't have it known, dear
That we own a telephone (oh, I hate telephones) (yeah, me too)
Day will break and you'll awake
And start to bake a sugar cake
For me to take
To all the boys to see
Oh, we will raise a family
A boy for you, a girl for me
Oh, can't you see
How happy we would be?
We will raise a family
A boy for you, six little girlies for me
Can't you see
How happy we would be?
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Irving Caesar / Vincent Youmans
Tea For Two lyrics © Capitol CMG Publishing, Downtown Music Publishing, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Royalty Network, Songtrust Ave, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc
Inmate: Nurse! Why did you give me Tylenol for my pain?! I need something stronger! I’m experiencing eupnea!
d.: What would you like for your normal breathing?
IM: Give me so me acetaminophen!
d.: Okay, there you go. Two 325mg tablets of acetaminophen.
IM: That’s better…HEY! This is the same thing!
d.: But I gave you what you asked for. Next!
!
Officer: I don’t like the way that inmate is acting! I have the key, so I’m out of here (as soon as someone helps me get out of my chair).
C.: Hi, d.c., I see that the Z security card is working in medical today.
d.: We always get the Z card. That’s why I have the inmates convinced that my pockets are filled with scalpel blades.
C.: Are they?
d.: What aren’t you and your husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken and you practicing your Pong for your big match tomorrow?
C.: Oh, that match was canceled.
d.: Why?
C.: Because the other team was filming us practicing…
d.: Isn’t that illegal?
C.: Technically, yes. However, it worked to our advantage. When the other team saw how well T. picked up the game the first time he ever played, or even saw it, they forfeited. They didn’t want to be embarrassed. So, we’re still heavy weight tag team cat fighting champions of the world. I decided to come to work on the day shift just for a change of pace.
d.: Well, is T well enough to train for his next cat fight?
C.: He is, however, since we won without even playing a game, he decided to celebrate.
d.: How?! He’s not ingesting catnip, is he?
C.: Oh perish the thought, d.c. T is serious about his training since he lost thirty-four pounds and moves like a…well, cat.
d.: So, how is T celebrating y’all’s victory, then?
C.: He’s having tea with my cousin ELAC.
d.: To celebrate winning a Pong match that was supposed to be a cat fight won by forfeit? I guess that makes sense. What’s y’all’s next move?
C.: That’s actually why I’m here. I understand that there’s voyeur in the back who’s really good at setting up cameras inconspicuously.
d.: And you want to talk to him to find out how he did it?
C.: Yes.
d.: Cal.E., he wasn’t that good, or he wouldn’t have gotten caught. And, it’s illegal for you to film your next opponent training.
C.: Only if we get caught. Now, what is that inmates name?
d.: That’s all the time we have for today, folks. Please join us tomorrow for another episode of Cal.e.’s Korner.
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