Got a call from an old friend, we used to be real close
Said he couldn't go on the American way
Closed the shop, sold the house,
bought a ticket to the West Coast
Now he gives them a stand-up routine in LA
I don't need you to worry for me, 'cause I'm alright
I don't want you to tell me it's time to come home
I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life
Go ahead with your own life, leave me alone
I never said you had to offer me a second chance
(I never said you had to)
I never said I was a victim of circumstance
(I never said)I still belong (still belong)
Don't get me wrong (get me wrong)
And you can speak your mind
But not on my time
They will tell you you can't sleep alone in a strange place
Then they'll tell you you can't sleep with somebody else
Ah, but sooner or later, you sleep in your own space
Either way, it's okay, you wake up with yourself
I don't need you to worry for me, 'cause I'm alright
I don't want you to tell me it's time to come home
I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life
Go ahead with your own life, leave me alone
I never said you had to offer me a second chance
(I never said you had to)
I never said I was a victim of circumstance
(of circumstance)
I still belong (still belong)
Don't get me wrong (get me wrong)
And you can speak your mind
But not on my time
I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life
Go ahead with your own life, leave me alone
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Billy Joel
My Life lyrics © Impulsive Music, Mpl Communications Inc
d. Come on, Cal.E, pick up the phone
C.: Hello?
d.: Cal.E., You need to come to my house and help me write our blog. Also, The Kennel called me to ask you when you were going to come to work. You’re supposed to come in tonight and cover for your son Ralph, who’s touring with Beauty and the Glowfish as their bassist and backup vocalist.
C.: I don’t have time, and I don’t feel like doing either, so I’m not going to. It’s my life, and I’ll do as I please.
d.: Cal.E., stop acting like a spoiled teenager and come help me write today’s blog.
C.: No can do, d.c. My husband, Tucker Tucker Two, a.k.a. The Cat Fighter Formerly Known As The Tuxedo (who really needs a shorter nickname) Now Simply Known As T Because Triple T Was Already Taken has invited me to go to a gala tonight, and I accepted. It’s a high society thing, so I want to go. Tucker's already dressed and ready to go, so make it snappy.
d.: So, all it takes to get an invitation is looks and a whole lot of money?
C.: Well, those two things plus the right connections.
d.: I thought that you loathed these high society types.
C.: I did, until I married Tucker. Then, my whole world changed.
d.: How so?
C.: Well, with T’s money, we can go on vacation whenever we choose, eat caviar if we want, and just laze around Wayne Manor while the servants do all the work. That helps me with my LCS.
d.: Well, first of all, lazing around the house is what you were doing when you had no money. Y’all can’t go on vacation any time soon, because T has cat fights lined up for the next three months, and he wants you to compete with him when there’s a tag-team match. That’s why both of you have been going to the gym and training so much. That’s hardly laying around the house. And, to top if off, the only servant y’all have is your cousin ELAC, who’s cleaning Wayne Manor in lieu of rent. Y’all really should hire someone else, because she’s actually a brilliant scientist and mathematician from the planet HTRAE. Tucker should hire someone else to clean his house and let ELAC be free to devise a way to get back to her home planet.
C.: d.c., if ELAC goes back to HTRAE, I’ll be the one cleaning Wayne Manor. Tucker doesn’t believe in using other cats for domestic work. That’s why he cooks and cleans the kitchen. He never asked ELAC to do anything to make up for the fact that she can’t pay us rent. She just decided that it was best that she did something because she felt guilty.
d.: Cal.E., isn’t the cure for your condition, Lazy Cat Syndrome HARD WORK?!
C.: Such language, d.c. It’s a good thing that we’re out of time for today, or what I have to answer that question may have been censored.
#$%&!@#.
d.: Um, Cal.E, we’re still live.
C.: Oh #$%&!@#.
d.: Please join us tomorrow for another (G-rated) episode of Cal.E.’s Korner.