Cal.E.'s Korner

C. (ring) Hi, D.C., what are you up to?

D.: oh, just looking at the John Deere letter I got in the mail.

C.: Oh, I’m so sorry.

D.: Why?

C.: Doesn’t that mean the Eudora finally wised up…I mean decided, after careful consideration, that you two would be better off living apart?

D.: No, not a Dear John letter. A letter from John Deere. They want me to buy a small tractor. Besides, Eudora has too much of a headache to write a letter right now.

C.: How small? I mean, is it smaller than a bread box?

D.: Cal.E., do you even know what a bread box is?

C.: Sure, CNN says it’s one of these,

And Cats Need kNowledge is never wrong.

D.: Well, in this case, it is correct. However, John Deere is having a sale on riding lawnmowers…

C.: I thought you said they wanted you to buy a small tractor.

D.: They do. That’s what a riding lawn mower is, a small tractor. And John Deere has a reputation for building the best tractors in the world. My dad had one that he inherited from his dad, and it lasted about fifty years, I think.

C.: Was that tractor bigger than a bread box?

D.: Yes, Cal.E. And, before you ask, it was smaller than a 747,

It was a big tractor, but I was too you to recall how  large. The numbers on the side tell how much horsepower the tractor has. I don’t remember the numbers on my dad’s tractor, only that it started by using the steering wheel to turn the fly wheel.

C.: Cool! A flying tractor.

D.: No, Cal.E., the fly wheel is what the starter turns to turn on the engine.

C.: and this tractor didn’t have a starter?

D.: I’m not sure. I just remember my dad taking off the steering wheel to turn the flywheel to start the engine.

C.: So, are you going to buy a tractor like that?

D.: Well, it is tempting. They have everything from a basic model to one with a zero-turn radius, which is convenient for the driver, but it does hurt my grass. Besides, my mowing crew can barely get their large mower in my eight hundred square foot yard. That mower does have a zero-turn radius, and that is bad for the grass. Hmm….Maybe I should fire the mowing crew and buy the tractor…no, then I’ll be the one who is hurting my precious grass blades. I guess this is a problem without an immediate answer.

C.: And I need to use the sandbox immediately.

D.: So, I suppose that’s the end of this cat ta(i)le.

Please join us next time for another edition of Cal.E.’s Korner.